The subject came up over the week while I was talking to my wooby about how men and women deal with things differently.
inorite?!? Like, ALL the time! </sarcasm>
It’s not enough that we recognize men and women respond differently. If we’re going to get on, we’ve got to get to where we understand why and how. *
Wooby said that whenever his wife (or any other female companion from years past) needed something from him relationship-wise – more time, more sex, take out the garbage, etc – he felt like “he was in trouble”, and this created a sense of panic on his part as his insecurities started to rage. He got defensive, he got testy, he got irrational, and even if the normal part of him agreed that, yes, he probably should take a few more turns washing the dishes, the other louder part of him started freaking out because ZOMG SHEEZX GUNNA BRAK UP WIF MEE! (or something to that effect) due to a lack of performance on his part.
(And every woman reading this just rolled her eyes and nodded, having experienced this at least once.)
(And every guy fidgeted in his chair and thought about surfing away from this page.)
What men don’t realize is that if we chicks didn’t trust you to fix the problem, we wouldn’t ask.
Let that sink in for a minute before I pontificate.
The key word in that whole sentence is not “fix”, nor “ask”, nor even “chicks”. It’s trust.